Jared Kushner stunned fellow diplomat Steve Wittkoff yesterday by allegedly brokering a deal to turn part of the Ukraine into a stunning seaside resort, "the likes of which have not been seen since Gaza."

Both Russia and Ukraine would have access to this "spectacular area" in Dnipro, the most hotly contested area over which Russia and Ukraine have been fighting for years.

Dnipro is landlocked, but this a a "minor problem that can be solved by millions of dollars in investment income," said Kushner. Kushner's theory is that the antagonists in the war would immediately cease hostilities" in order to partake of the beautiful, relaxing facilities."

Steve Wittkoff, the other "diplomat" sent to broker peace between Russia and Ukraine, was jubilant as Kushner announced the deal. "We may not have brokered peace, but we acquired a piece, and that's just as good if not better."