President Ttump boasted on Truth Social today that he had scored a -5 after playing 18 holes at his golf course in West Palm Beach. “It’s truly the most astonishing achievement in the history of the game,” he boasted, adding, “You know what was hard? Reducing drug prices by -1000 percent. Not hard? Hitting a -5. Barely had to get out of the golf cart.”

Several onlookers claimed that Trump had not, in fact, gotten out of his golf cart on many of the holes, but whizzed right by them as though racing toward a cheeseburger.

Some questioned Trump’s pronounced results, noting that the President had occasionally miscalculated in circumstances that “involved math,” “compared facts,” “assessed a situation,” or “recounted things.”