Democrats remain fiercely divided on how to rid themselves of the prospect of achieving the party’s goals, with moderates arguing that the best course of action is to try not to get anything done now until they can’t get anything done after losing power in 2022.

Senators Joe Manchin and Kristin Sinema refuse to move legislation forward or abolish the filibuster because it would make it harder for them to take millions of dollars from corporations interested in blocking progressives’ progress. “I think we have to be bipartisan, and by that, I mean we have to let Republican partisans have their way and block everything, ” said Manchin at a D.C. bank, where he was depositing several enormous checks from oil and gas companies. “I stand on principle.”

Kristin Sinema was unavailable for comment because she was at one of her own fundraisers, where she lingered at the open bar, “drunk with power,” Arizona constituent Dale Bledsoe muttered.

In the House, moderate Democrats were in favor of being “proactive” by demanding concessions from President Biden instead of waiting for Republicans to do so. “We’ve got to get out in front of this thing,” said Rep. Filemon Vela (D-Tex.), who continued to claim that Filemon is a real name.