December 20, 2009
Democrats To Actually Vote For Own Bill

Democrats Secure Momentous Sixtieth Vote From Other Democrats For Incredible Political Victory

In an amazing show of political leverage and power, the Democratic party managed to pursuade a Democrat to vote for the Democrats' Health Care Reform Bill this past week.

Democrats gloated over what they claimed was evidence of Senate Majority Leader's Harry Reid's "immense heft" and President Obama's "legislative prowess".

"Wow, when you can just snap your fingers and get Democrats to support their own bill, that's something," said political observer Prof. Ronald P. Moar.

The crucial sixtieth vote was finally wrested from Senator Ben Nelson (D - Nebraska) with the ease of prying a gun from Charlton Heston's cold dead hands. Nelson said he was reluctantly going to vote on the side of his party in exchange for several bags of gold bullion and the addition to the bill of an unconstitutional provision reenacting slavery in his home state of Nebraska.

In the final days of fierce negotiating, Nelson, Sen. Joseph Lieberman (Idiot - Conn.), and other reluctant members of the Democratic Caucus just managed to craft a bill every member could get behind by stripping the health care reform measures from the health care reform bill. "Now that's reform I can really get behind," said Sen. Joseph Leiberman, just before reversing himself and saying that he was not sure he could get behind it.

"This is unprecedented," said Prof. Moar, "With this kind of cohesiveness and support from within their own party, there's no telling what Democrats will be able to do in the future." Prof. Moar reflected.

"Absolutely no telling at all."

Posted by Tom Burka at 12:38 PM in News | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

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