November 6, 2008
Presidential Daily Briefings

President-elect Barack Obama will learn the full "burdens of office" tomorrow when he receives his first top secret briefing from the Director of National Intelligence, Mike McConnell.

President-elect Obama began receiving Presidential Daily Briefings (PDBs) from the CIA today. "President Obama will get exactly the same daily briefing that President Bush receives," said White House Press flack Dana Perino. Perino vigorously denied allegations that, for years, Dick Cheney had forced the CIA to "shape" its briefings to Bush to support particular political views.

OYSH has received copies of today's daily briefing for the President and the President-elect. Here are some excerpts:

Presidential Daily Briefing (Obama)

Good morning, Mr. President-elect.

The situation in Iraq is incredibly fragile, with distinct factions in both Sunni and Shi'ite camps precariously balanced against each other. Violence could re-erupt at any moment. Civil discontent is high. Electricity and water supplies are still below pre-war levels and Iraqis are increasingly frustrated with the American occupation.

Presidential Daily Briefing (Bush)

Good morning, Mr. President!

It's another great day in America.

Things couldn't be better in Iraq. Those people are just lapping up the freedom. Sources indicate that we have been greeted as saviors. The war has been won! Iraqis are thankful that the Americans are still present in great numbers to make their lives better and serve the cause of liberty.

Presidential Daily Briefing (Obama)

Iran is clearly working on developing the ability to manufacture nuclear weapons. We estimate that this will take at least six years. The situation requires careful monitoring, but we believe diplomacy and U.N. pressure is safer than even the limited use of military force.

Presidential Daily Briefing (Bush)

Iran will drop a nuclear bomb on Israel as early as next Thursday.

Presidential Daily Briefing (Obama)

North Korea has restarted its nuclear program. Kim Jong Il has suffered a stroke but factions vying for control of the government are fighting about whether to break with Jong Il's warlike tendencies or to develop a missile that can hit California.

Presidential Daily Briefing (Bush)

North Korea is still right above South Korea. Everything's just fine!

Presidential Daily Briefing (Obama)

The world economy is headed for even sharper declines. This will likely create more resentment and anger toward the United States.

Presidential Daily Briefing (Bush)

The need for oil continues to produce record profits for oil companies all over the world that will trickle down to enrich the temporarily depressed markets . Prices are low but there are some good values out there! Everything's fantastic! In response to your question about the world marketplace, Mr. President, it is still possible to get a good hamburger outside of the United States.

Presidential Daily Briefing (Obama)

We are entering very dangerous waters, with challenges regarding nuclear proliferation, the terrorist threat in Afghanistan, Russia's increasing tendency to use military force to expand its influence in defiance of the rest of the world, and other threats to the security of the nation. The present executive's disregard of some of our warnings and advice has greatly contributed to the current unstable and perilous world environment.

Presidential Daily Briefing (Bush)

Your policies have never been more effective! Things look grim, but they're really not! Peace and prosperity are just around the corner. Some day, history will recognize your utter genius. Good job, Mr. President!

Posted by Tom Burka at 9:27 PM in News | Comments (2)


Hello. And Bye.

Posted by: XRumerTest at November 12, 2008 11:19 AM

dude you know what I'm talking about! soy desole

Posted by: beinuounk at November 21, 2008 6:18 AM

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