President Bush called John McCain a "true conservative" this past Sunday, and told reporters that McCain would certainly do a fine job of continuing the Bush Administration's policies.

McCain's supporters were very upset and said there was no reason for the President to "attack our candidate." "I don't know what John McCain has done to President Bush to deserve this," said Gladys Denovio, a self-described moderate Republican who heads the Midwest chapter of Boosters for John McCain.

"It was an uncalled for, vicious thing to say," said lawyer John Bristol of Ohio. President Bush had no reason to be so harsh, he added. "What's next?" Bristol asked. "Is he going to call McCain a butthead?"

True conservatives also criticized President Bush's statement, saying that when President Bush showed that he knew what true conservatism was, they expected to be able to watch pigs fly over ice hockey rinks in hell. "Until then he should keep his mouth shut," they suggested.

"George Bush is the first so-called conservative to cut taxes while vigorously increasing the size of the Federal government," said political expert Professor Madeleine Fullbuck. "Maybe we should call him a right-wing religious economic conservatiberal."