July 6, 2004
Kerry Chooses Humphrey As Running Mate
Post, Times Totally Miss Boat
John Kerry announced today that dead former Vice-President Hubert Humphrey would be his running mate in the upcoming election. Kerry had the foresight to discuss the ticket with Humphrey many years ago (see picture at left), while Humphrey was still alive. Humphrey, whose death has not impeded his ability to speak, is eager to accept the nomination later this month.
Incredibly, the New York Post reported this morning that Richard Gephardt was Kerry's choice.. Those of us manning this page are helpless to explain how a newspaper or journalistic equivalent such as our own could ever get the facts so wrong.
Kerry's announcement regarding Humphrey also lays to rest the relentless speculation and rumor that John Edwards, and not Humphrey, was chosen. Kerry was forced to abandon his consideration of Edwards when the Disney Corporation was granted a preliminary injunction against his doing so, on the grounds that an Edwards-Cheney Vice-Presidential debate would infringe upon Disney's copyrights and trademarks.
Andrea Flange, a spokesman for Disney explained, "There's only one Beauty and the Beast."
Posted by Tom Burka at 3:02 PM