January 30, 2004
GOP Attempting to Lure Unnamed Democrat Back Into Race

At the suggestion of Karl Rove, Republicans are trying to get the unnamed Democratic candidate back into the race for President. Polls indicate that President Bush could have an edge over an unnamed Democratic opponent of 51 to 41.

"That's either percentage points or numbers of justices on a greatly expanded Supreme Court," explained pollster Jilly Ferprume.

Polls now indicate that the President may not do as well against a named Democratic opponent, such as John Kerry.

"We're trying very hard to get the unnamed candidate back into the race, but he has been reluctant," said Sam Guffren, a Republican advisor who wished to be quoted anonymously.

"He's short on funds, and he's been able to get this far on sheer name recognition alone," said Guffren, "but that's changing."

Posted by Tom Burka at 8:07 AM in News