September 23, 2003
Bush Administration To Star In Remake Of Oliver; Orphan Pickpockets Object

George W. Goes To U.N. With Bowl In Hand; Beggars Resent Comparison

Beggars objected to the startling revelation that George W. Bush was to be cast in a remake of Oliver. Bush will play the title role. The epic Dickens musical will be restaged to show orphan George W. Bush being thrown out of the United Nations for asking for support from the member countries when he's gotten quite as much as he deserves.

Bush will then fall in with a bad crowd of neocons, with Donald Rumsfeld as Fagin and Karl Rove as the Artful Dodger.

"It's not a fair representation of beggars," said Will Smythe of the 14 Farthings Row Flophouse in Kennery, England outside London.

"Most beggars ask for money and stuff," he said. "They know better than to insult you when they're doing it."

Posted by Tom Burka at 9:03 AM in News